Top 3 Tips to Getting Unstuck

As seen on FanDate October 30th.

Sometimes it feels easier to stay stuck than it does to take the first step towards anything that requires us to change. We weigh the benefits and the risks in our minds and decide that the risk of putting ourselves out there is much greater than the benefit we could potentially receive. We minimize the benefit in our minds until it becomes a fraction of the great risk. Are we really doing ourselves a favor when we decide to stay stuck though? Think about it this way: is the benefit of staying stuck greater than the risk of never pursuing your dreams? I will be the first to admit that change is scary, but which one is scarier: staying stuck or trying to succeed? What is the best possible outcome of staying stuck? Perhaps it is that we find comfort in the things that we already know. In contrast, what is the best possible outcome of chasing our dreams? We might reach them and live a life full of joy and fulfillment. Now which risk are you willing to take?

Here are my top 3 tips for getting out of that rut that is keeping you stuck:

1. Think of the worst thing that can happen.

If you are in sales, then the worst thing that can happen is someone might tell you "no". If you are "cold calling" statistically you will hear about 100 "no's" before you hear 1 "yes". Well, the odds of you hearing "yes" are much smaller than the odds of you hearing "no" so should you just give up before you even get started? How much is that one "yes" worth to you? And more importantly, why are you afraid of hearing "no", because isn't that the real reason you are having a difficult time getting started?

2. Stop making excuses.

The most common excuses I hear from my clients who want to start a business, but haven't gotten started yet are:

"I am afraid someone will steal my idea"

There are no guarantees that someone will not "steal" your idea once you start marketing your business or your product. The best thing you can do to secure your idea as your own is trademark it, get a patent, and include your intellectual property in your non-disclosure agreements, licenses, sales contracts, and technology transfer agreements. These are all things you can do ahead of time before launching your business.

"It has already been done, so why should I even try?"

If you are questioning why you should even try, then I would say that you haven't unlocked your purpose yet and you are not clear on what your vision is for your business. Let's say you know exactly what you want though. Even if it has been done before and you perceive the market to be saturated with people doing the exact same thing, not everyone can offer the product or service the same way that you can. You have a unique gift that nobody can take from you. You also have the opportunity to research the market and figure out a way that you can improve upon what has already been done.

"What if I fail?"

At what point did we start believing that failure reflects negatively on our character and that we need to strive for perfection? Turn your failures into lessons, welcome them. When was the last time you heard a story about someone who is considered to be very successful who never experienced failure? While I wouldn't recommend failing at the same thing over and over again, I do think there is value in looking at our failures and growing from them.

3. Attach yourself to the process instead of the outcome.

Someone asked me during the FanDate Talk Show if there was such a thing as having dreams that are "too big". Of course, my response was "No! There is no such thing." I think your dreams should be as big as you want them to be. If your dreams are attracting haters then that means you're doing it "right". We run into trouble as visionaries when we do not set a realistic timeline for achieving those dreams and when we do not identify the road map for how we are going to get there. This can be especially troublesome when we have created a vision for our future and the path has not already been paved for us. It can stop us in our tracks when we are not sure of how to go down a path that nobody else has been down before us. This is where we have to separate the process from the outcome. The outcome is that dream that seems "too big" right now, but not impossible. Write it down somewhere where you can see it every day or put it on your vision board and hang it in your office. That is going to keep you motivated and inspired to continue to reach for it when you feel like firing yourself from your own project. Now take a look at the process. Identify the steps that you need to take to get you from where you are now and where you want to be. Set daily, weekly, and monthly goals that are going to help you get there. Be sure you have a way to measure these goals so you can look back and see how far you've come and also so you can see how far you have left to go. This is going to give you an idea of whether or not you are going to reach your goals in the time frame that you had in mind.

4. Surround yourself with like minded people.

If you are surrounded by other people who are doing the same things that you are doing (i.e. building a business, overcoming obstacles, re-inventing themselves, etc.) then it will be a lot easier to stay motivated when you feel like giving up.